3 Reasons Jamie and Karine are the Bestest Best Friends Ever! (OMG YEAH!)

by Jamie Rice

Dear Karine,

This is my list of things that I want to get done in the new year:

2 reasons why jamie and karine are the best best friends ever

So in case you ever wondered where I was at, I just wanted to let you know that you might not have topped my love of popular culture, but hey you’re a close third (or second if you combine the books with the films) so just know that you’re on the list at least.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the fact that you’re going to be up there living a big life in the city while I will be down in Elon doing a little small town living, so we will, at least, not be roommates for five months. While we could all sit around and go on Tumblr and post sad over the top fucking quotes about love and bullshit (coughcough*karina*coughcough), I think it would be way more fun to go over all of the super awesome times that we have had in the last three and a half years. So let us begin what may or may not become a dumb ass listicle (ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE WOO):

The Eclectic Crisis

I can’t even believe I’m bringing this up, but I know that Karine was going to grill and burn me for it eventually, so I might as well write about it from my perspective first. Of course, in the modern day college process, you learn your roommate initially via an email from your university. So I got an email with Karina’s name in it. We both proceeded to find each other on Facebook, and then after a little bit of pushing from my mother I decided to send the first message to Karina (a decision I will most definitely regret for the rest of my life). So anyway I sent this message to her (and I just looked it up on Facebook and dear god it’s embarrassing) and in it I described myself as eclectic, which Karina said gave her a heart attack because she thought I was a total weirdo. Now that I am retelling this story for like the thousandth time, I feel like maybe this isn’t one of the great moments, but I have to admit my complete failure to communicate does make this a pretty funny meet cute in our lives. (Karine, I’m sure you’d like to elaborate more on this entirely embarrassing moment in your next blog or some day, so feel free.)

The Glove-Putting-On Conundrum

Sometimes people enjoy the satisfaction of a good many drinks on the night of Halloween. And sometimes this person is dressed up as Audrey Hepburn, so they’re wearing those ridiculous gloves from Breakfast at Tiffany’s. And sometimes this person is also meeting their BFF’s boyfriend for the first time, and they can just tell there is a solid and meaningful connection, which begins to warm this person’s cold dead heart. Well to be more specific: Basically, I drank a good many drinks and then after texting I couldn’t get my glove back on. So Karine and her then boyfriend helped me put it back on together, and I found the whole action to be so beautiful in my drunken stupor that I began to sob sweet and ugly tears of happiness. That was a great moment. I guess. I can’t think of any other way to describe it, so let’s just go with great. Okay? Okay. (HAHAHA you see what I did there, bitch! No filter. Fucking none at all.)

Karine was the cat. I was Audrey. 

The Laughing-in-the-Rain-Getting-Called-a-Cunt Situation

This one takes a little bit more background to set up, but I promise it is worth it. First we have to go back to our sophomore year. We had a roommate, long story short, and she didn’t like me because she thought I was a lesbian. (Which is beyond offensive. Never hate someone for that ever. It’s dumb. So useless. Don’t do it.) So that’s the first thing you need to know. Second, every year there is this big mud pit party at our school called Festivus. (Just google “Elon University Festivus”. It’s the most famous thing about our school, weirdly enough.) Junior year Karina and I decided to go to Festivus with one of our other friends. We lost her immediately upon getting there and we got pulled out into the mud. Immediately upon getting out into the mud, it was also raining so hard and was so cold by the way, we just start laughing for literally 10 minutes straight. No exaggeration. But the fun doesn’t end there. No, no, no. (What happened with the old roommate?) I am glad you asked! She saw us! For the first time in forever, and guess what she did. She called me and Karina cunts to our faces and told us that we were awful to her. And you know what we did? Fucking laughed in her face. We literally had the last laugh. Boom!

Seemed appropriate.

Okay! That’s all of the good moments I’ve got time to go into right now, but I just wanted to remind you that we had some amazing times. And there are so many more to come. Love you, Mom. Have fun in the NYC, babe.

Love,
James

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