You Lying Bitch! (I love you)

by Jamie Rice

Dear Karine,

You fucking got me. You got me real good, and I have never been happier.

surprise motherfucker


And due to this crazy ass surprise, I haven’t even gotten the chance to finish my damn blog post. I’ve been too busy having a perfect life that involved me getting drunk and shopping with you (IN THAT ORDER)! For all of our fans (aka Rachel and sometimes Mags or Autumn), Karina came down to visit me this weekend, and she lied to me about it! She said she wasn’t coming down! (The title is all of a sudden starting to make sense to you.)

But otherwise, the weeks was kinda great. I think it was because I embraced an ancient proverb you have been trying to get me to embrace since freshman year of college:

star wars look at all the fucks i don't give

Don’t give a fuck

How did I “not give a fuck” this week? Glad, you asked fictional internet reader! I will give you an example:

Procrastinating All the Time (And Actually Not Minding it) 

Last week, I had an essay. It was due on Friday. All week on my to do list, I looked at this item “Enlightenment Essay Outline,” and I never worried about it once. Occasionally, I would work on said outline. Other times I would not. Then Friday came. I finished the essay. Read it a few times. You read it, and I submitted it. Done and done. No need to freak. No need to stress. Most importantly, no need to give a fuck.

It was lovely. It wasn’t even just lovely. It was… Karina… wait for it… (you know it’s coming…) it was….. de-lovely. BOOM BABY!

emperors new groove boom baby

Sometimes, you just have to.

Outside of that small example, I do think that I have finally started calming down about my life and future and etc. I just realized that life is what is happening to me right now, you know? It’s not going to start in six months any more than it already has. Life is happening, babe. I just gotta keep living it and roll with the goddamn punches.

And that’s all from Jamie this week folks. I’m going to leave you all with the smooth sounds of Hoodie Allen, Blackbear, and Kyle. Here is….. Champagne and Pools!

Much love love love,



P.S. Get psyched for Karina and Jame wreck shit round two in NYC next weekend!